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Woman to Woman

Honest talk from an ob/gyn & menopause practitioner dedicated to mid-life women

  • Catherine Hansen

Open that bottle of champagne

There was once a woman who had a dress she was saving for a special occasion. She had it for years and never wore it. Then, she only ended up wearing it once—at her funeral. Reflect on that for a second. Have you heard this story before? Do you know someone who has a dress in the back of their closest that they're "saving". Is it you? If so, I recommend you watch this 17 minute TedTalk by Gillian Dunn that touched me deeply. The Emergency Department nurse explores how in this day and age we live in a world of abundance, but suffer from scarcity mindset.


We accumulate SO MUCH stuff in a lifetime that stays stored—a special dress we're saving, good china for when guests come over, or a luxury car that spends more time in the garage than on the road. These are just a few examples Dunn gives. "Our tendency as humans to stockpile stuff is based on two mindsets: I am not enough and I don't have enough." Dunn says that "when we're shopping, we're looking for those things that are missing in our lives" Don't have enough time? Buy another power tool for that deck project you don't have enough time for. Haven't lost the weight? Buy a pair of pants that will look so much better after losing that stubborn last 10 pounds. Don't feel special or important? Buy a pair of stilettos that make you feel so good in front of the mirror, but they never leave the house. I think you get the idea. "We stand in the store and we convince ourselves I can become enough for these items. But something happens between the cash register and our closets. Whatever convinced us we could become enough for these items disappears—we make room in the closets and we make room in the garage and we forget about them." These items whisper promises to us - I'll open that bottle of champagne when I make partner or I'll wear that dress when I finally lose the weight. These scarcity mindsets "keeps our clothes in our closets and the champagne going flat in the bottle." But what if when never comes? As a registered nurse in the emergency room, Dunn has first hand experience with life & death. On bad days she's reminded that life can change in an instant. So create a life that you enjoy & love. You ARE enough to have and use your things and you don't have to keep waiting for when. Look around your home—is there anything you've been saving for the perfect time? I invite you to use it this week! Use the fancy china for a relaxed Tuesday dinner or open that bottle of champagne for no other reason than to savour it. This is you one precious life and you're in control.